Category Archives: AFL

The Boomtown Rap Awards for 2010

Here they are, late again, random and disorganised as ever. Don’t expect balance. Don’t expect fairness. Don’t expect decency. Do expect a wanton rant.

Expectations duly lowered or raised, as the case may be, let us proceed according to tradition by channeling The Small Faces’ Ogden’s Nutgone Flake album narrator, Stanley Unwin…

Are you all sitting comftybold two square on your botties?? Then I’ll begin…

2010 Boomtown Rap Free-to-air TV Awards: The Bogeys

Best Drama: Breaking Bad. Not just the best for 2010, this whacked out series tops any drama I’ve seen on TV. Big call, but I’m makin’ it. Continue reading The Boomtown Rap Awards for 2010

Wishy Washy Woosha!

OK, this is a somewhat gratuitous post. I admit it – it’s all about the title. Couldn’t resist.

I should preface the following by declaring that John Worsfold contributed the most unforgettable and thrilling moment of poetic justice in the history of Subiaco Oval footy when he shirtfronted Hawthorn bullyboy, weight-thrower and general wanker Dermot Brereton on August 18th, 1991. The ecstatic crowd response was something I was part of, for which I thank Woosha, God and the fates for all eternity.

For those who would like to relive that magic moment, here it is:

Of course, Woosha was an intrinsic part of the coming of age of the Eagles, and of the legendary team that took off the club’s inaugural flag in 1992, and repeated the feat in 94. And he coached a succeeding generation to their third Premiership win in 2006. Bouquets, brickbats and bent-low bowings. Thank you, Woosha.

But what happens to this esteemed hard man of WA footy when he gets in front of the camera? It’s like Superman changing into Clark Kent! With the possible exception of Kylie Minogue, John Worsfold would have to be the blandest interviewee of all time. Kyles is urgently in need of a personality transplant, but Woosha’s interview impotence is all about attitude – he refuses to take a stand on anything but not taking a stand on anything! That’s wishy washy, Woosha! Continue reading Wishy Washy Woosha!

Why Has The Nanny State Forsaken Our Jocks?!

Came across a shocking report on today of a Darwin mother dobbing in her serially offending 16 year old son to the cops for stealing. Not only that – she was hoping “the little bastard” would be thrown in the clink, and bemoaned the leniency of the justice system when junior received only a finger tap on the wrist. She was quoted thus: “It annoys me that my taxes are being spent like this. You do the crime, you do the time. It’s the only way you learn.”

Told ya it was shocking. A parent of today advocating her brat be made to face the consequences of his actions? That her own progeny be forcefully educated on the notion of personal responsibility?

Then again, her little shit isn’t a jock, and you’d hope her attitude would be different if he was. Jocks, remember, are a protected species in the wide brown land, born faultless. But we call ourselves a democracy, and one of the great flaws of our system is that we have to pretend to treat everyone approximately equally. One of the rotten fruits of this utopianism is the sort of legal egalitarianism that poor Nick D’Arcy and poor Barry Hall have recently fallen victim to. Continue reading Why Has The Nanny State Forsaken Our Jocks?!